Do you ever wonder if there is an end to temper tantrums thrown by your child? Is there something called the terrible twos? Do you feel that there is no specific age for temper tantrums? Do you pick up “what to expect” books to find explanations for that super tantrum in the park that reddened you to your ears? Relax! Take a deep breath…there is light at the end of the tunnel!
Try to ignore it
Most kids would cut down on a tantrum if mommy or daddy were not paying attention. Children try different methods to test their boundaries. They are smart; they try tantrums to sometimes get their way. If that is the case, do try not to pay too much attention.
Try to talk to them
It is a good idea to convey to your child, to use words instead of screams and tears. It is important to make them understand that if they are using their words, it is easier for you to understand what is causing them pain and help them accordingly; whereas their screams do not explain the source of their anger or dissatisfaction, they just make every one unhappy. Help them realize in the words of Lynne Kenne, Psy.D., the co-author Bloom , “My anger is a sign that I need to problem solve rather than explode.”
Breathe in, breathe out
It is a rule of thumb that anger does not combat anger. When angry, try thinking about a funny/happy incidence and it will show on your face. Mostly, children calm down if they do not see the reaction they are expecting to. We all know it is difficult, we have been there! Try to avoid a screaming match, as this will only worsen the situation.
Cajoling works sometimes too for a toddler tantrum:
Be creative and turn a tense episode into a funny incident! Distractions work wonders with small children. Offering a small token of love such as an extra big hug or word of praise is mostly effective. Do NOT try to pacify them by offering a bribe; this is one of the major catalysts for tantrum episodes. Children start using tantrum to get what they want.
Make your point clearly
If need be, do not hesitate to show them your firm side. Try not to lose your temper but make your point. Parents have his or her own way to let their child know where the line is drawn.
Do not forget to offer words of praise to your child if he or she cuts down the tantrum. Every cuddle and word of praise makes a positive mark on children. Children who grow up in a loving home are always confident and secure about themselves.
Yoga and Meditation
Current research says, introducing yoga and stress-relief meditation techniques and even music and art, work very well in calming children.
Lori Lite, a parenting stress expert and author has created a line of books, CDs, to help children and parents to fight stress, anxiety, and anger. “Her sought-after practical tips provide parents with real-time solutions.”
At some point of his/her life, a child will grow out of such tantrums. Always believe that you are doing your best for your child. There is no black and white rule to combat a tantrum. Every child undergoes this phase; for some these phases are short, for some they are long. However, every child does grow out of it eventually. The basic rule: trust your instincts; you know your child best. Trust yourself and act accordingly.
- Fast Ways to Stop Temper Tantrums
- Terrible Twos: Combating Your Child’s Temper Tantrums